Giving up on dating

It just makes you think about the last time you had amazing sex, which is in no way helpful.*Shakes fist at universe*They're easy on the eyes, but trying to be with them would be like putting your heart through a meat grinder.

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Do we side with life and invest in love, or do we choose the path of a more self-protective and defended part of ourselves? In my 30 years as a researcher and clinical psychologist, I often reference the , a book by my father, Dr.

Robert Firestone, that aims to explain people’s resistance to love.

Our tolerance for love is established early in our lives and is based on our unique childhood experiences.

The specific ways we were hurt influence us and come to shape our capacity for closeness. We may choose partners who hurt us in the same ways we’ve always felt hurt.

When we work so hard, we miss time with our partner.

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